wassup guys.
i got a confession.
these few days i ate alot.
ALOT MEANS ALOT.
i dont know why but im feeling quite down.
many things going thru my head and im just unmotivated to do anything.
i slept for the whole day today after eating breakfast.
n now im just wasting time.
i donno what i want to look foward every single day.
i used to have one but its long gone n outta my reach.

my mom told me i used to be very competitive in nature.
like during kindergarden i competed to be the 1st in class.
but when i got second i cried.
as i got older, its just seems to me that there arnt any worthy people to compete with.
it aint just worth it.
as each day pass i feel damn empty.
i wanna test myself out, wanna know what im really capable of doing.
but in the end, i end up doing no shit.
i used to go to sleep with a thought.
everything will turn out fine the next day after a good night sleep.
and usually it does.
even if i dint do my hmwk or assignments it will still turn out fine.

actually i wanted to join the sp rugby club.
but i dont have any boots to wear.
i think im going to just go and have a look tmr.
see what im supposed to see and if god willing i will join.

everytime i wonder.
wonder what im going to do next.
pounder on it for hours.
and end up sleeping deeply.
i wanna compete to be the best.
but in what area?
that is the thing im searching.

peace im out